Feedback For The Pursuit of Mandy

[Jarrett Osborne]

Hi Everyone!

I would love to hear any new feedback from some new readers on one of my two strips, The Pursuit of Mandy. I have provided the link to the site, linking to comic 101. You can go back to the archives if you want to #1, but 101 to present is where the comic started it's current style.

http://thepursuitofmandy.com/?p=250

Looking forward to the feedback.

jarrett

[Lee Nordling]

Whoops. I didn't see this, and posted my thoughts in the other thread.

Here they are again:

You've got a fun, eclectic style.

Now, here's the comment you may/could/should choose to ignore. I think your color palette is too bright, with far too much in the same value range, and that makes differentiation between visual elements tough. The creature at the end of the survivor island would've worked much better if I didn't need to look closely (beyond the color) to see what it was.

Wild color is fine--I'm not suggesting you conform to somebody else's aesthetic--but right now, it doesn't survive the "squint" test. Squint at it, and the images become indiscernible, when we SHOULD still be able to tell what's going on.

Just my two cents.

I think you've got a wacky (in a good way) style that's fun to look at.

--Lee

[Joshua Skurtu]

I have to agree with Lee on the color. I didn't know how to put it into words, but he did it right. While I love the art, it's hard for me to tell when characters start and end, because everything is so bright and at similar tones. My eyes are not drawn to the characters / word balloons and I seem to get lost in every single frame, which slows down the comedic momentum. Timing is EVERYTING! :)

Also, just my opinion, but it would help if the word balloons had tails and were whited out. Because they too are colored in, they don't stand out from the rest of the artwork.

Very interesting style. I'm not too sure who all these characters are, though. I think anyone trying to "jump in" should be able to figure out who and/or what everything is. It took me about 7-10 strips to catch on that everyone but the girl is an imaginary friend. Do I have that right? I'm not even 100% sure on that.

Keep up the good work.

-Josh
www.theohnozone.com

[guy]

I'm kinda with Josh on the balloon colors, though I think you should keep the color, but perhaps offset them from the background color a little more. Dave Mckean used to use colored word balloons a lot. One thing he did I would suggest is to use a different color for each character and stick to it. In the second to last panel on 10/17 comic of yours, it's hard to tell who's talking. I'm assuming it's the first character, but you're using the color of the second character, and it's a bit confusing. Just my thoughts. Other than that, I really enjoyed your work.
Guy~

[Norm Feuti]

I like the character designs and your use of color, Jarrett. I wasn't personally put off by the color inside the balloons, but I could see it being hard on the eyes for others.

Your artwork has a unique and distinctive look to it. I like it.

[Joshua Skurtu]

Looking at it again, it might not be the color, but actually the fact that the balloons have color and the text is WHITE. I see every once in a while you use black text. I think that works better.

-Josh
www.theohnozone.com